So - Patric and I go the home equity line of credit - and he and I both discussed...do we remodel the bathroom or do full blown IVF. We both decided that the bathroom remodel was the better choice. It was something that for sure would happen. And I had said after the mini-ivf cycle failed that that was it...I can't put anymore money into this. I even wanted to get rid of all the baby stuff in the fall of 2012. Patric said no though - so we didn't.
Anyway - fast forward - we start with the bathroom remodel and we are happy - it is closure, it means we chose to move on from trying to conceive. Of course, there was always a chance - but I really was moving on. I did meet someone who gave me some info on herbs and I started taking them in the summer of 2013 - they really helped regulate my hormones and I was having normal cycles again! Some even as short as 28 days...but NEVER over 35 days again after I started the herbs. This was HUGE to me, so I kept taking them, because I knew they were helping my body operate the way it should.
In January, a good friend of mine, my sister though this infertility journey, let me know that she was pregnant. I was, of course, ECSTATIC for her...but then of course my thoughts turn to...did we make the right choice choosing the bathroom over trying medical interventions again. Again, I felt like we did make the right choice and was ok again.
Patric quit his job. His last day was near the end of January.
We had A LOT of snow this winter... A LOT! And it happened to snow the week of Valentine's Day. I will tell you there was no action on Valentine's Day - we actually went to my brother Ian's house that day - and when we came home...it just wasn't on my mind haha.
Come February 27-28...I am looking at the calendar and I start asking Patric - when did we have "relations"...haha. I didn't tell him why or anything, but something was off. I counted the days and I was like, hmm...well...maybe I am just off? I didn't know when I ovulated this month - which after 4-5 years of tracking ovulation, I didn't need a test to let me know...I knew. And this month I DIDN'T KNOW! I had stopped taking my temperature months ago, didn't track anything...this is literally the first month I had no clue...which was actually great!
February 28 was a Friday. I remember because they had a movie night at Josh's school. I didn't want to go, I was feeling a little tired and sick to my stomach. I stayed home - but Josh and Patric went. I decided to pop some popcorn and watch a movie as well. I didn't eat much of the popcorn - it was making me feel sick. This was my second though - hmm...what is going on? I love popcorn.
Saturday comes - I am crampy and so I just figure - eh, I will probably start soon...but if I make it to Sunday I am probably pregnant. Obviously no signs of a period Saturday.
Sunday comes and goes...still no period - still crampy. I don't have any tests in the house - remember, we moved on...so I never kept the,.
Of course, Monday comes - and it snows. March 3 it snowed and Josh was out of school...again. I didn't want to make a trip to the store to buy a test that was going to be negative anyway - so we didn't go. At this point, I have let Patric know that I think I am late. I even texted my sister to let her know I think I am late.
Tuesday - March 4 - we go to target in the afternoon. Patric is like - just take the test in the morning. I was like, uh, at this point, if I am pregnant it should say I am - regardless of the time of day - because I believe I was at like 37 or 38 days now into my cycle...which wouldn't normally be weird except I was still taking herbs and my body was regulated and I never went past 35 days anymore.
So I took the test. and then I laid down in my bed. I didn't want to look at it...because now I had my hopes up. Now I NEEDED a positive test - even though I had told myself I had moved on. So I made Patric go look. He came out of the bathroom with a face that could have gone either way. He walked it over to me, showed me it and then we hugged and cried. I told him that we will enjoy this, no matter how long it lasts...because having three losses before I know that it isn't a sure thing just because I am pregnant.
Patric feels we need to tell Josh right away - I would have rather waited...but he really wanted to tell someone and I told him we weren't going to tell many people until after the 1st trimester was over. So we told Josh but swore him to secrecy. He did great by the way! He didn't tell a soul! I did tell my sister and I told my mom.
When I made my first appointment, they had me come in - confirm the pregnancy, do an ultrasound...and there is a possibility of twins. My HCG levels were quite high as well...like over 5000 and I believe I was like almost 6 weeks then. There was also another sack, though it wasn't a normal formed one, so my doctor had me come back about a week later to check on it. By then, the sack is gone and I am relieved. I love babies, but not sure I could do two at once! Big props to my friend Anna for being an awesome mom of twins...as well as all the other friends I know who have had twins!
So anyway - moving forward - all looks good. I tend to miscarry early - like 5-6 weeks, so I figure we may be in the clear. We go to sweden, of course we let them know over there, and we come home and have another appointment in which case, all is still developing and I am out of the first trimester. So I made the FB announcement. All the world now knows! Holy crap, things could still go wrong, but I feel pretty confident.
We have a few more uneventful months and appointments. I go to girls camp (I always swore if I got pregnant I wouldn't go to girls camp...but then I didn't want to miss it with my girls! Crazy how that worked out).
Anyway - we have the big ultrasound around 20 weeks(which I just realize was before school ended so before camp. Josh had some weird vomiting episode for two mornings and was fine the rest of the day but we didn't let him go to school...so he missed the last two days of school and got to go to the ultrasound with us)...and of course, the little stinker isn't very cooperative. I had to lay and shift and all that jazz for an hour! The ultrasound tech was having a difficult time getting measurements, let alone a gender shot. I was SO done! The last two things the tech needed was the heart shots and she was willing to try again to see the gender shot. She got her heart shots and then she saw the gender. She was about 95% sure it was a girl. Our little girl is a lot more modest then Josh. She had her legs closed the majority of the ultrasound and even shied away from the ultrasound wand when it would come close...I don't think she liked the ultrasound being done on her.
So - we find out its a girl...I think... and I am super excited! Patric and Josh sort of wanted another boy...but a girl balances us! Plus- I would love to dress up a little girl!!
The rest of the summer is uneventful...getting bigger...and uncomfortable. I have been much better this pregnancy about exercising and taking care of myself. I am not perfect - but I walked a lot and ate better than I did with Josh.
I didn't have gestational diabetes with Josh and I don't with Camilla. Not Group B positive either. Got an ultrasound around 36-37 weeks - all looks good. Baby's head is down. My doctor is totally on board with a VBAC - so now we are just in the waiting mode. I am 39 weeks and 1 day today. I had Josh at 39 weeks 4 days - but I was induced and ultimately had a c-section. I don't want another c-section if I can avoid it. I want to experience child birth...as crazy as that is!
So - here are some pictures through the months!
Here I am about 16 weeks
Proof miracles happen! Anna pregnant with her twins and me about 17 weeks pregnant.
20 weeks pregnant - getting ready to go for a walk
Camilla at 20 weeks - she has some long legs!
This is me at 25 weeks on vacation at the beach - about to go for a walk
This is 27 weeks - hello third trimester! Getting large!
Josh talking to his sister - this is 34 weeks
This is 37 weeks and 2 days
Here I am at 39 weeks!
She can come anytime now!! We want to meet you little Camilla!!
There you go - that is my pregnancy story in a nutshell. Tonight is trunk or treat, tomorrow is Halloween - and then I am ready for her to come whenever she likes (preferably sooner rather than later!).
-Sasha
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